Wednesday, October 16, 2013

The Wilderness

As our adoption journey continues, and we keep pressing on. I keep going back to Exodus and the Israelites trek through the wilderness.

I keep going back and studying and studying trying to grasp what God is trying to show me. I keep feeling like we are there, walking in this wilderness.... having no idea when we will finally reach our destination. And having to completely trust God to provide all of our needs.

Then it clicked.

As I read of their time in the wilderness, I continue to see the many times they question God and worry that he isn't going to take care of them. First they were worried about water, then food, then water again. And every single time God proved that he had them in his hands the entire time.

Reading this from an outsiders view - I was like HELLO people! Don't you know he will take care of you, aren't you aware of all the amazing things he has done to provide in the past???

I read this when searching different studies on the wilderness online:
"Somehow, no matter how many times the Lord comes through for the Israelites, they are inclined to doubt God’s immediate presence and ability. After the plagues, the parting of the sea, the provision of water, bread, and quail, why would Israel not be absolutely confident whenever they encounter difficulty? Yet the slightest adversity throws them."


As I look back on our journey, I can see where every stumbling block, another increased wait time, or a denial of adopting kids that your heart just aches to be their parents.... every single time - we go back to God and whine and wonder where he's at in it all. If he's going to make it happen, if he is going to bring children into our home, if he will finally deliver and provide our hearts calling and desire. And every single time we are reminded of what he has done. We are reminded of his faithfulness and reminded of his promises. We by no means doubt God or doubt that adoption is something he has called us to... but we question his timing, we question the journey, and we question the hurts. Not much difference in us and the Israelites.

Why do we question when we know he has always been faithful? We can look back and very very evidently see Gods provision in ALL of it. We can see his provision in the hurts, in the set backs, in all the frustrations of waiting. He is there in all of it. Every part of our journey has led us to something better, and closer to our destination and yet we continue to question whether or not he is there in the wilderness with us.

Where are you at? Are you stuck in the wilderness questioning God's faithfulness? Look back and see all the things he has provided and been faithful in and remind yourself... there is no reason to doubt his presence, even in the wilderness.

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