I am with you....

This past month God has been speaking to me in so many ways, it just continues to encourage me, and help me to grow in my relationship with him. Its been so uplifting that we continue to receive confirmations of what he was already speaking to us through other people.

Last week I posted about Not Giving Up... when I went to church on Wednesday we were talking about Running the Race, and guess what... not giving up! The woman leading the study shared this video... these 2 women were running this marathon and were at the point of their bodies giving out on them. I somewhat have felt the way these women look, falling clumsily and exhausted trying to just get to the finish. God has been totally amazing in blessing our fundraising efforts for our adoption. We have raised over half of our costs so far! Don't get me wrong, I could not be more thankful and happy about this. It is truly unbelievable the amount we have raised, and how far we have come in such a short time. All glory goes to God! We have worked SO hard to get this far, and this past week I just sat and looked at how much more we had to go, and it is hard to picture doing everything we have done already again to finish the other half. Lately I have just had to ask people for forgiveness because I am somewhat in a fog. I am tired, I cant remember what I did yesterday, let alone a week or month ago. These past few months feel like a blur! I do not want anyone to think this is a pity party or complaining post... We CHOSE this -yes, and we would rather work really hard and do everything we can to earn the funds than have other people just hand us money... but that doesn't mean that its always easy. Right now I feel we are at the bottom of a mountain about to run up it, and looking at the one we just climbed and came back down thinking how in the world can I do this AGAIN? My answer.... Christ's strength! He is going to get us through this, our only job is to look to him, not the mountain! Look above it, and passed it! They always say, don't tell God how big your problem is, tell your problem how big your God is... SO TRUE in this circumstance! I refuse to sit back and think, I can't its just too big, not again, I've already gotten this far- I just need to keep pushing and finish strong, even if it is crawling to the finish like these women.

So after a few days of focusing on pushing through my race. I was listening to a Christian radio station and the DJ shared a verse he said God had showed him. It was Matthew 28:20 I am always with you. This just gave me peace of knowing all these times of barely pushing through, and struggling to get through the next fundraiser... he is ALWAYS with me! With each step in this race I am taking, he is there. Not only did this give me a peace in that situation. But lately I have become more and more aware of the fact that the first several months of our child's life... we wont be a part of it. And God told me, not only am I always with YOU but I am always with your son too! God will be with him in the orphanage every day, and with him in every circumstance. And that even though I can't be with him for those first few months... God is! And I couldn't ask for a better babysitter :)

I just wanted to share my heart with you, and allow you to see a glimpse of the things God is showing me, and reminding me of.